Friday, June 19, 2015

UBC ANNOUNCES ANOTHER MERGER

 CREATES LAP DOG LOCAL 4
 IN ANOTHER BOLD MOVE CAREFULLY RESEARCHED BY THE DIRTY DOUGY  MCCARRON AND TINY DICKFER THINK TANK THE UBC INTERNATIONAL HAS ORDERED ANOTHER MERGER. MILLWRIGHT LOCAL 2.3 AND SONNYS ESCORT SERVICE HAVE BEEN COMBINED TO CREATE

CARPENTERS  LAP DOG LOCAL 4

PRESIDENT  
DAN"THE LITTLEST SPICE GIRL" MCDONALD

VICE PRESIDENT 
JUSTIN "BEIBER"WEIDNER
 FINANCIAL SECRETARY  
BERNIE MADOFF
 RECORDING SECRETARY 
GUMBY

WARDEN  
MIKE"FEDERAL PRISONER" FORDE
 LOCAL 4 MOTO
WHY HAVE SKILLS WHEN YOU CAN SUCK YOU WAY TO THE TOP


MEMBERSHIP TRAINING CLASSES BEGIN ON NOVEMBER 1,2015
                
 CPR CLASS  
(LEARN TO HUFF, PUFF AND BLOW)

OSHA 10  AND OSHA ASS CLASS

STAB YOUR BROTHER OR SISTER IN THE BACK CLASS


BECOME A DOUG RIGHT HAND MAN CLASS
 
PAY UP AND MOVE UP.KNEE PADS OPTIONAL

ORGANIZE BY LIES SEMINARS 

 
ORGANIZE OR ELSE.YOU LIE WE WILL SWEAR TO IT


HOW TO SPOT A DERANGED LONER AND COMMIE CLASS

FIGHTING THE COMMIE PLOT TO OVERTHROW THE UBC IN PORTLAND

HOW TO SPOT AN ANARCHIST CLASS 
TH RED MENACE

WIFFLE BALL CLASS



(PREP CLASS FOR THE 300 HITTERS CLUB) 
2 ASS IN A FIELD 300 SUCK ASS IN VEGAS

HOW TO SPOT A NUTTER CLASS
TAUGHT BY WORLD FAMOUS NUTTER DR SCARY HACKENSTEIN

A SPECIAL 5 DAY COURSE ON HOW TO SUCK THE CHROME OFF A TOW BALL


MANDATORY FOR ALL LOCAL 4 MEMBERS 
NOTE:APPRENTICES ARE EXPECTED TO PROVIDE THEIR OWN TOW BALL SOMETIMES ALSO KNOWN AS "SHANLEYS DREAM"

WHY SAFETY TRAINING IS IMPORTANT

CORRECT CPR

UBC VERSION OF CPR
 
WHY?BECAUSE WE LIKE IT
WHO SAYS YOU CAN LEAD A DOG TO WATER BUT YOU CANT MAKE HIM DRINK


UBC LAP DOG LOCAL 4
OU 812 NORTH 3RD ST
LOST ANAL 
CALIFORNIA 12011
1-818-777-7777

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